My mind is like my internet browser: 19 tabs open 3 of them are frozen and i have no idea where the music is coming from
Humor
Browsing: Humor
Nutrition fact: If you drink a gallon of water per day, you won’t have time for other people’s drama because you’ll be too busy peeing. Stay hydrated my friends
Humor
“A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished.” – Zsa Zsa Gabor
@Zsa Zsa Gabor
“Husbands are chiefly good as lovers when they are betraying their wives.” – Marilyn Monroe
@Marilyn Monroe
“Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who’ll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you’re in the wrong house, that’s what it means.” – Henny Youngman
@Henny Youngman
“Humor can get in under the door while seriousness is still fumbling at the handle” – G.K. Chesterton
@G.K. Chesterton
“A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain” – Mark Twain
@Mark Twain
“There are only two kinds of people who are really fascinating: People who know absolutely everything, and people who know absolutely nothing” – Oscar Wilde
@Oscar Wilde
